And so, suddenly, last week this book jumped off a shelf at me again. My own shelf. This time I caught it and chose to embrace it. I haven't finished it yet, but it already has changed me.
Change, and yet not change. For I am beginning to feel my way towards a balance in the tension between Jesus being my binding and my center, and still honoring this pull I have had inside me since childhood. I'm not off on some rabbit trail of syncretism, but rather an integration of a place deep within me into my existing relationship with the Jesus I hold to. I have no interest in other gods, for I have always known my God better than I know my own heartbeat. But there is something that has been missing from every expression of Christianity I have ever known; a recognition of the hand of the divine in the earth and it's history and that which grows and lives and upon it and surrounding it.
As I have read, it has swirled around in me, altered my perspective, or better put, it has brought about an admission of a perspective I have held so long. Being tied to the past, to the people and the mountains and the earth. To have story and myth and connectedness, not only linear connectedness, one to another. Not only vertical connectedness to Spirit, but circular connectedness to past and future life. To honor the living things that God has put here to allow us to live. To be kind to this mother whom nurses us and grows us up. To respect and hold the wind and the water and the green and the desert that are all part of our continued existence.
More later...
Fear and Honesty: The Pagan Stacks
Fear and Honesty: Connectedness
Fear and Honesty: Diverting from the Norm
Fear and Honesty: You are what You Read
Change, and yet not change. For I am beginning to feel my way towards a balance in the tension between Jesus being my binding and my center, and still honoring this pull I have had inside me since childhood. I'm not off on some rabbit trail of syncretism, but rather an integration of a place deep within me into my existing relationship with the Jesus I hold to. I have no interest in other gods, for I have always known my God better than I know my own heartbeat. But there is something that has been missing from every expression of Christianity I have ever known; a recognition of the hand of the divine in the earth and it's history and that which grows and lives and upon it and surrounding it.
As I have read, it has swirled around in me, altered my perspective, or better put, it has brought about an admission of a perspective I have held so long. Being tied to the past, to the people and the mountains and the earth. To have story and myth and connectedness, not only linear connectedness, one to another. Not only vertical connectedness to Spirit, but circular connectedness to past and future life. To honor the living things that God has put here to allow us to live. To be kind to this mother whom nurses us and grows us up. To respect and hold the wind and the water and the green and the desert that are all part of our continued existence.
More later...
Fear and Honesty: The Pagan Stacks
Fear and Honesty: Connectedness
Fear and Honesty: Diverting from the Norm
Fear and Honesty: You are what You Read
15 comments:
well, yeah . . . :)
Thanks for sharing your journey, I get so much from it...
Burn her! Burn her!
(Only kidding, Erin!)
Your journey is mine, baby. Loving loving loving sharing it with you.
Reading certain Christian authors (most often male, white, city dwellers) I can feel the disconnect. It comes through in their theology too.
The further I go into this the more patently insane it seems that we could live any way OTHER than being grounded in the earth and to each other.
Sara, you sound like this is elementary...and it is...but seriously, it's stuff I've been taught against.
Thanks Barbara. I'm glad.
Yeah, but I don't read the Qur'an, Barry. :)
"The further I go into this the more patently insane it seems that we could live any way OTHER than being grounded in the earth and to each other."
Absolutely. And yet, as you allude to, somehow we think we can, and our white middle-class men seem to think that too because that's what they tell us.
LOL! Maybe you should read the Qur'an as well - it's interesting stuff.
Back on topic, I've always felt closer to God when I'm out in the countryside than anywhere else. God is primarily a God of mountains and woods to me, not a God of buildings and books.
Well I actually do own a copy of the Qur'an, have only read bits and pieces, though.
And I completely agree with what you say about nature. 100%. In fact, I told my SD last week that maybe one reason I'm so averse to church is because it's in a BUILDING. And it seems to me it should be outdoors.
But then for both you and I, our climates aren't really conducive to that...so I don't know the answer.
I hope I didn't sound derogatory. Your post made me smile, and I affirm your movement and direction. :) The first job that God gave people in Eden was as stewards and caretakers of the Creation of which we are indeed a part. We are created beings, made of the stuff of earth, made to join God in drawing ever more beauty out of creation . . . and that has never changed, no matter how much our sin has warped that and no matter how much Satan (or whatever/whoever else you might want to call it) tries to convince us that breaking and destroying are more true than building up and beautifying. One of the relationships that Christ came to restore is truly our relationship with the rest of creation. And I truly look forward to the day of the remade heavens and earth when we will live in a world that doesn't fight us.
Sara - No you didn't sound derogatory. I took you to mean "Duh", but in a good way. :)
Because you're right, but so much of my experience in evangelicalism has pushed me away from any affinity for nature...certain that the next step is polytheism...ya know? So it's strange for me to admit it.
I'm with Sara. ;)
The first thing I thought as I read this was "Madeleine L'Engle." Have you read any of her stuff? What you wrote totally reminded me of one of my favorite books of hers - "An Acceptable Time." I would highly recommend it. :) Actually, I think I might go re-read it... :)
Thanks Happy. I haven't read any of her stuff, though I should have because I've been hearing about her since elementary school. :) I'll look into getting it at the library.
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