I have been following a series by Sherman Kuek on "Christian Friendship". It's been a lot of good stuff...but today his post on Grace in Christian Friendship really struck me because it's the main thing I attribute to the loss of several good friends in the last year.
This is not saying I was this model perfect friend and they completely lacked grace. I know every relationship goes two ways. Even though I see myself as a grace person, I know that in my observations of people who seem to "lack grace", I am often lacking grace in my assessment of them. Does that make any sense? In other words, when I am critical of those who seem to be lacking grace in their relationships, am I lacking grace for being critical?
Sherman says,
I am not certain if he is finished with the series, so be sure to check back with him on it.
This is not saying I was this model perfect friend and they completely lacked grace. I know every relationship goes two ways. Even though I see myself as a grace person, I know that in my observations of people who seem to "lack grace", I am often lacking grace in my assessment of them. Does that make any sense? In other words, when I am critical of those who seem to be lacking grace in their relationships, am I lacking grace for being critical?
Sherman says,
"It is strange how we often almost too easily assume that others are not trying hard enough, or that they simply are refusing to try to live a life that is consistent with Christian ideals. It is somehow difficult to see that, just like us, others are perhaps actually trying to live their lives in the best way they know how.I could copy the rest of this post verbatim, but instead I'm gonna send y'all over to Sherman on the Mount to read the series. It's good...beginning with "Company of Friends", and continuing into "On Friendship (Prologue)" and "On Friendship" parts 1-5."Could it be that the imperfections we see in them exasperate us because they are so reflective of our own inadequacies (of which we hate to be reminded)? Could it be that our reluctance in offering grace is reflective of our own reluctance in acknowledging that we too actually need grace from God and our friends?
"Of course, there are those who neither feel nor acknowledge the need for grace or friendship. But friendship is not for everyone. It is for those who desire it and who know that their lives will be enriched by it."Many people find that friendship is a futile exercise, for it is a waste of time. Others think that they are already engaged in that which they perceive to be friendships. And yet others engage in friendships that are abusive, such that they become the abusers. Hence, friendship is not for everyone; it is not even simply for anyone who calls himself "Christian".
I am not certain if he is finished with the series, so be sure to check back with him on it.
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